In school we learned information skills, but who is there to help us navigate in the world of feelings? Many of us did not receive sufficient education in this area growing up and we end up repeating old uncomfortable patterns of suppressing our feelings and/or inappropriately expressing harmful emotions.
Our unique retreats help you grow your emotional intelligence.
These intensive 3-4 day retreats are ideal for people who feel emotionally blocked, have difficulty with feelings, or get caught up in grief, anger, anxiety or other difficult emotions.
At the retreats you learn life changing Skills of Loving to increase your emotional capacity for intimate, caring relationships. You’ll get help with your own uncomfortable feelings, even if they’ve been buried inside of you so that you are hardly in touch with them.
And you’ll also learn how to respond more appropriately to the feelings of others.
Denied, Suppressed Feelings
As a child, were you told messages like:
Boys don’t cry
It’s not ladylike to express anger
Children should be seen and not heard
I’ll give you something to cry about
There’s nothing to be scared of
Growing up with these types of messages can cause us to suppress and deny our feelings in order to be accepted and loved. So we swallow these feelings, and they hide below our ordinary awareness, in our bodies.
Sometimes they are hidden so well that we lose touch entirely with our feelings and we feel we don’t have any anger or fear or grief.
I see many clients who have numbed themselves out by suppressing their feelings. They can end up depressed and depleted of energy. And very often their bodies are rigidly armored, with tight muscles, digestive troubles, aches and pains.
As these same clients come alive again their bodies release what has been held for so long. They feel bigger and more energized and look younger, brighter, freer.
Was growing up a hostile environment? Were you held hostage by a parent's anger or grief or fear?
When one person holds all the power, there is an imbalance that, as adults, we need to correct in ourselves, so we can be more whole and healthy.
Sometimes a whole feeling is taboo in a family, banished.
Was there unspoken grief? Often this can lead to depression. Did a parent or sibling die young? Was this talked about and truly grieved? Or was one of your parents depressed?
As adults we may need to do the work of healing past hurts, grieving what was never acknowledged.
Depression and Emotional Intelligence
Many depressed folks come to our emotional intelligence retreats to heal old pain. They may be feeling unmotivated and lacking in energy. They may have tried medication and therapy and still feel depleted.
Medication, exercise and therapy can, in many cases, be helpful. Yet, very often depression is related to suppressed feelings that are stuck within us. As these feelings are worked through, especially grief, the depression begins to lift.
Depression is about depressed, pushed down feelings. When our life force is squashed, our life energy is depleted, and our lives are small.
Whether you’ve been living a sad story, a scary story, an angry story or whatever, the retreats help you increase your emotional intelligence so that you can begin to live a new more joyful and free story, unencumbered by the past.
The EQ Retreats
Our retreats improve emotional intelligence, not in an intellectual way, but by healing our feeling nature so we can be more fully present and alive to our rich emotional capacity as a human being. In this way we can be there for others as a loving, nurturing presence.
As we own our own anger, fear and grief these feelings are transformed. We become more fully alive, joyful and emotionally flexible.
And there's a powerful, positive side effect…we can be more present for others, able to listen without reacting, less afraid of being controlled or manipulated by others.
At the retreat we practice the art of deep listening, of seeing and hearing others, and honoring their thoughts and feelings. These skills can change your life as they have changed hundreds of others.
We have two related retreats to help people work though their feelings and improve their emotional skills. If you are interested in either one please contact me, using the form below, so that we can have a short 10 minute or so discussion to help us determine if the retreats are appropriate for you. There is no charge. (I also offer longer phone and Skype consultations at reasonable rates.)
For more on the specific retreats to improve your emotional intelligence go to:
Grief, Loss and Other Difficult Emotions Retreats
Breaking Through The Old Story/ Shalom Retreats