Long Distance Grief Counseling

With Jon Terrell, M.A.

Are you seeking long distance grief counseling? Would you like to find relief from emotional pain? Do you find yourself stuck in grief and needing a way out? Have you grieved long enough?

We offer confidential grief counseling by phone and video. We encourage people who contact us to attend one of our emotional healing retreats, as the retreats can bring deep relief and healing in a very short time.

But some people can't travel to one. People can benefit from our grief counseling wherever they are located.

Counseling is not a substitute for a Grief, Loss And Difficult Emotions retreat. At the retreats, we go beyond words into the feelings associated with loss and, with the power of love in a group setting, transform stuck grief, loss, and other difficult feelings. But when a retreat is not possible, counseling can help.

The retreat includes a talk component, but also a deeply healing body component. Our feelings get stuck in the body. Grief shows up, for example, in a heavy heart, a sluggish, tired, exhausted body, an aching stomach, a bone weariness, etc.

Other feelings show up differently, in other places in the body-mind. When we are stuck in complicated grief, the feelings all interact, locking us into a sad, uncomfortable, and even hopeless place. It is not surprising to find anger, anxiety, and other deep emotions along with the grief.

While the power and depth of group healing work cannot be duplicated through verbal counseling, counseling can be very helpful, especially when we combine verbal talking with practices that engage our whole self...body, feelings, perceptions, intuitions, thoughts, etc.

Who Can Be Helped By Grief Counseling?

People experiencing grief and loss due to:

• The death of a loved one
• The end of a relationship
• Divorce or separation
• Difficult life transitions...loss of a job, retirement, moving to a new area, etc.
• Loss of physical abilities, illness, aging, or disability

You can also be helped if you are experiencing some of the following symptoms that may be a result of unresolved grief:

• Depression
• Sleeplessness
• Loss of appetite
• Feeling disconnected or isolated
• Lack of interest in the activities of daily life

What We Can Accomplish In Grief Counseling

Our grief counseling can help you understand what you are experiencing and begin or accelerate the process of moving through grief. 

We grieve because we have loved and now feel the loss of that love. Grief is a natural process of mourning loss, and, while it is uncomfortable, is only a problem when we are stuck in it too long. And "too long" is different for each person.

We get stuck in grief due to suppressing it or other feelings. Our society is not very good at dealing with grief. We are told to get over it or to distract ourselves from it. Many people never deal with their losses; they step over them, rise above them, suppress them. And that can lead to depression, anxiety, and other feelings that are here to tell us something is wrong.

Friends or relatives, trying to be helpful, may encourage us to go shopping or do another activity to distract us from our grieving process. Sometimes distraction can be helpful, but oftentimes what we really need to do is to turn towards our grief, and really feel that feeling, really mourn the loss. 

In grief counseling, we have a large toolbox to help you through grief and the related feelings. The first and primary tool is active, deep listening. All of us, and all parts of us, need to be heard, and yet it is often hard to find someone close to us who can deeply listen without an agenda other than listening.

Most people don't want to listen or don't know how. They are much better at distracting...often because they haven't dealt with their own past grief. People give advice more often than listening. (At our retreats we have a big sign that says "Advice Free Zone.")

Before we can move on, our story needs to be heard, in all its complexity. And most loss is complicated...there are mixed feelings of anxiety, sadness, even anger within it. Verbalizing the story to someone who can deeply listen to your words and your meaning can bring deep relief. Finally, when all our feelings are heard, we can start letting go.

Present grief can be further complicated because of unresolved grief from our past, especially our childhood. This suppressed grief and other feelings steal our life energy and weigh us down. When a loss occurs in the present, old losses come up too, and we try to work through and resolve them as well.

Stages or Phases of Grief

While everyone’s grief is different there are certain phases that are common.

The idea of stages of grief can imply that people go through a set progression of stages, and this isn’t so. I prefer to use the word phases instead of stages, to emphasis the non-linear nature of the tasks of mourning that people experience and accomplish.

You can read my article on Elisabeth Kubler-Ross and the “Stages Of Grief” here. 

Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, who helped create the modern hospice movement, interviewed dying people to tried to illuminate the whole process of death and dying. Later in her life she wrote about the similarities between the experiences of those dying and those who are grieving a loss.

Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance are the stages that she mentions in her classic book On Death and Dying. In counseling it is sometimes useful to identify these phases when they are part of your grief journey.

Personal Statement From Jon Terrell, M.A.

"I have been helping people with grief for over 30 years. Together we create a safe, confidential, and comfortable environment to support each client's process.

Each person has within them the power to heal and awaken, but we sometimes get stuck. Through active, deep listening I can help clients enter their stuck places to reclaim their light, love and power. 

I can offer encouragement and reassurance to help clients navigate uncomfortable places and find healing. 

I rely on linear, rational skills from years of counseling training and experience, as well as nonlinear, more intuitive skills based on years of teaching meditation and offering energy healing. I have an extensive toolbox of techniques that can often help, such as imagery, body-oriented practices, artwork, and rituals.

I generally follow a positive psychology approach, which emphasizes a client's strengths and abilities. It is wellness-focused rather than disease-focused, with greater emphasis on healing activities than on problem analysis.

Jon Terrell                                 

To Find Out More About Long Distance Grief Counseling

You can reach Jon through the form below. He tries to call people back within 24 hours, except when he is leading a retreat or traveling. Please let him know the best time to reach you.

Jon charges $200 for a 1-hour counseling session by phone; FaceTime or Google Meet work best. Payment is made through Zelle or Venmo.

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