The Gift Of Fear And Anxiety

By Jon Terrell, M.A.

What is the benefit of fear and anxiety? All our uncomfortable, painful emotions, including fear, hold gifts waiting for us to discover. What is the of gift of fear, and how can we access it instead of being its victim? 

We are all born with fears. Babies react with fear to loud noises and to the feeling of falling. As babies grow older, they develop other fears, such as being alone when they can't see or hear their caregiver.

Other fears can follow: fear of the dark, dogs, and certain people. We begin to anticipate fearful situations and develop anxiety about what may happen in the future.

As we work through these "negative" feelings, we unwrap gifts of healing and awakening. Growth isn't about fighting, conquering, or eliminating these emotions; it's about embracing them. And fear can be scary!

Do you want to learn how to overcome fear without avoiding it or overpowering it? To overcome fear, connect with it, embrace it, and let it transform you.

The gift of fear brings us wisdom, courage, excitement, and safety.

Of all the feelings, fear and anxiety are the most holy. They bring us to the present moment in all its glory. The gift of fear: its greatest gift of all is Love. Often, after someone at our retreats has done particularly deep grief work, a sense of vastness, silence, and energy emerges that the word Love can begin to embrace.

Working Through Fear and Anxiety
My work helps clients move through fear, anxiety, and other challenging emotions to find the gifts hidden within stuck emotions. We do this work primarily at our retreats and support clients in integrating these gifts into daily life through one-on-one counseling. To learn more about overcoming fear, attend the Grief and Loss Retreat or contact me.

What Is Fear?

Fear makes us want to hide, escape, or run away. We don't want to be seen or stay in the present. We shrink, trying to be invisible. Fear is often cold.

Physically, it's a contraction. If fear were a person, he/she would be small, thin, tense, closed, an introvert. He/she would think hard and fast, might hide, or run away.

In extreme fear, paralysis sets in...frozen in terror. A lifetime of fear's cold can thaw; I've seen this at our retreats, where people feel safe enough to begin working through fear and other stuck feelings. As a person warms up and slows down, they come back to earth and enter the healing power of the present moment.

Fear lives in the space between now and the future. Fear makes us ahead of ourselves, ahead of our bodies.

People attend our retreats primarily to focus on their grief. But grief, anger, and fear are often tied together in our bodies and minds. Many of us are conditioned to be afraid to grieve by our parents or others. We may have been told that to fear is shameful ("don't be a scared-ee-cat", etc.)

With fear, the focus shifts to the brain and nervous system, which become over-energized. We are afraid to see and know. Thoughts speed by, racing around and around, although with intense fear the brain can go numb,

Fear pulls us into the future... what will happen next, what might harm us.

Fear reacts to something that may harm us.

One of fear's gifts in its raw form (as opposed to worked through) is that it warns of potential harm to ourselves or those close to us. As such, it's an early warning system that can protect us from violence. A great book on this subject is called The Gift of Fear, written by Gavin de Becker. Fear can help us sense violence before it happens and take appropriate action to protect ourselves.

But fear is even more valuable as we recognize it as a feeling that we can transform and grow from.

What Is Anxiety?

Anxiety is closely related to fear and has the same physical symptoms and personality type. Anxiety is always about the future, and it steals the present moment from us, even though that is the only place we ever are, and the only place with true safety and energy. For more on anxiety and how to work with it, go to our Anxiety Page.

What is the Gift of Fear and Anxiety?

• Expansion
• Wisdom, Insight, Clarity, "Ahas"
• Excitement, Energy
• Relaxation and Ease
• Courage
• Present Moment Awareness
• Spiritual Awakening

Of all the feelings, fear and anxiety are the most holy. Arriving at the present moment in all its glory. The gift of fear: its greatest gift of all is Love. Often, after someone at our retreats has done particularly deep grief work, a sense of vastness, silence, and energy emerges that the word Love can begin to embrace.

Working Through Fear and Anxiety

My work helps clients move through fear, anxiety, and other challenging emotions to find the gifts hidden within them. We do this work primarily at our retreats and provide support in integrating these gifts into daily life through one-on-one counseling. To learn more about overcoming fear,  contact me. 

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